My friend and I decided to take a trip to London for some
exhibitions. We usually do this in the summer but this time we decided to stay
for a few days and spread everything out. Four exhibitions over three days
seemed doable but I have recently struggled with my back and already cancelled
a holiday to Cornwall so it was a bit touch and go. One thing we forgot to do
was book assistance. Usually we book a ticket with East Midlands but this time
it was cheaper to go with the Trainline so there was no button to book
assistance. We meant to ring East Midlands to see if we could book anyway, but
the weeks went past quickly and we forgot all about it until it was too late.
After checking-in we went off to Tate Modern to see the
Matisse exhibition. This was my friend’s treat and she was really enjoying
herself, but these exhibitions are difficult. They are held in vast spaces with
very few sitting areas, usually filled with people sketching or elderly people
resting. We noticed a few people with fold out stools and realised they would
be a great addition to our kit! The interesting thing about the exhibit was
that it was on Matisse’s cut-outs, a phase of his work where he was using a
wheelchair. The smaller cuttings were easy enough to do but for the larger
pieces he had to employ ingenious techniques such as using the walls of his
house as a canvas by sticking things up there using a long stick or brush.
Eventually he had two assistants helping him and just told them where to place
the pieces. It was an interesting lesson in how someone could continue their
life’s work despite disability. The tendency to capture fluidity and motion in
his work was a stark contrast to his own stiffness and immobility.
We followed this bit of culture with a special tea at The
Sanderson, a hotel we've never been to before. I have to add that all of this
travelling to and from has to be done in cabs. Both of us suffer vertigo on the
underground, beside which it is so busy and we can’t stand, as well as the fact
that in the summer it is far too hot down there to cope with. This adds up
quickly so any saving for these trips has to take cabs into account. The tea
was a Mad Hatter’s Tea, but we were a little early so first we were taken to
the bar to have a cocktail. The bar was a big island in the middle of the room
with tall bar stools that had a heavily made up eye on the back of them. I
figured that if I could just use my good leg to push off and put my bad leg on
the spells I would be okay. Yet I realised half way through the manoeuvre that
I don’t actually have a good leg and the leg on the spell would be the one
pushing. No amount of swapping legs would do and I had to think out the manoeuvre
way more than should be necessary. All my efforts only succeeded in pushing my
bum in the air and stomach on the seat! On a last precarious attempt I had to
trust that the bar stool would stay in one place and I heaved myself up using
my arms to lean on the bar and just hope it got my bum high enough to reach the
stool. Luckily it did, just, and then I had to do a shuffle backwards. The only
problem with this was that I was now a good foot away from the bar, so I had to
wobble backwards and forwards moving the stool to the bar an inch at a time to
prevent me falling off the edge. Dawn French could not have done it better! A
quick look around soon showed me that this was a place for business men and
beautiful, young women with hair down to their bottoms and no hair anywhere
else. They were immaculately groomed and could actually sit down onto a bar
stool rather than having to climb it in a fashion that would suggest we were
being asked to climb Everest. This was not a place for slightly tired, 40
somethings who were a little bit sweaty after a three hour journey and two cab
rides with a long art exhibition in between. We consoled ourselves with a very
strong cocktail and a game of pick out the prostitute (the one with a man twice
her age, too well turned out for the afternoon, who only drank half a glass of
champagne before disappearing upstairs for 45 minutes then leaving again).
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